As an entrepreneur, caregiver, and productivity coach, I’ve learned a critical truth about burnout that most people miss. It’s not just about being tired—it’s about a complete system shutdown that no bubble bath can repair.
Burnout is more than occasional stress or a bad week. It’s a persistent state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion that can derail your personal and professional life.
When you’re experiencing burnout, simple self-care strategies like a massage or a weekend getaway become nothing more than temporary band-aids on a much deeper wound.
In this episode, I’ll break down what burnout really looks like, why traditional self-care approaches fall short, and provide actionable strategies to help you recover and thrive.
Whether you’re a high-achieving professional, an entrepreneur, or someone feeling overwhelmed by life’s demands, understanding burnout is the first step to reclaiming your energy and passion.
The Burnout Trap: Why Self-Care Alone Won’t Fix It
Welcome to the Positively Living Podcast. I’m your host, Lisa, and today we’re diving into a topic that’s very close to my heart, and honestly, one I see come up time and time again, with clients and friends. Today, we’re addressing burnout: not just what it is, but why this idea that “self-care will fix it” is a trap that not only gives self-care a bad rap but also leaves you worse off than before.
As someone who’s navigated burnout myself – juggling caregiving for elderly parents, the joys and challenges of motherhood, and running my own business – I know what it feels like to operate on fumes, having nothing left in the tank, living in survival mode. It’s exhausting and, honestly, unsustainable. And I also know how common it is for people to suggest more self-care, like a bubble bath or a massage, as if that’s going to magically make it all better.
The Importance of Real Self-Care vs. Pampering
Don’t get me wrong, I am a HUGE advocate for self-care. I love massages. They are wonderful for stress and healing. I’ve featured it repeatedly on the podcast and have a whole playlist dedicated to it, which you can find on the PODCAST page of the positivelyproductive.com website. I also have a roundup episode where I summarize 10 self-care episodes that offer simple, actionable self-care ideas. This one in particular is helpful if you don’t have time and love a good summary so you can feel inspired and know where to deep dive next.
Throughout all these conversations, we’ve focused on differentiating between pampering and what I like to call real self-care – the kind that truly nourishes and recharges you. There’s a crucial difference. A pedicure can be nice–I’m the first person to jump at sandal-ready toes–but it’s not going to address the deep exhaustion and overwhelm that comes with burnout.
Burnout is a Systemic Issue, Not a Superficial One
Self-care, in its true form, is essential for our well-being. But it’s not a cure-all for burnout. Thinking that it is, is a bit like putting a band-aid on a broken leg. Sure, you might cover it up, and maybe even help it not hurt quite as much, but the underlying issue is still there, in need of attention and healing.
This is because burnout is a systemic issue, not a superficial one. It’s not just about being tired; it’s about emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion caused by prolonged or excessive stress. It’s what happens when you feel overwhelmed, emotionally drained, and unable to meet constant demands…sometimes it’s when you’re unable to meet basic demands. It’s not just about having a bad day or a stressful week; it’s a persistent state of depletion. It’s when you are soul weary.
Recognizing the Early Signs of Burnout
How do you know if you’re experiencing burnout? It manifests in various ways, and sometimes it can creep up on you slowly, making it hard to realize what’s happening. In episode 206, I shared some early signs of burnout that might surprise you. I encourage you to listen to that, but let’s review it here as well.
Burnout might feel like the following:
Physical Exhaustion
This isn’t just feeling tired after a long day, it’s feeling chronically drained, even after a full night’s sleep where you just can’t rest enough. You might experience physical symptoms like frequent headaches, muscle tension, stomach issues, or a weakened immune system, leading to more frequent colds or illnesses. If this sounds like stress response, you’re right. It’s all the physical symptoms. For instance, you might find yourself constantly reaching for caffeine just to get through the morning, and crashing hard in the afternoon. You get into a vicious physical cycle.
Emotional Exhaustion
This involves feeling emotionally depleted and overwhelmed. You might feel irritable, cynical, or detached. You might also experience mood swings, anxiety, or depression. An example of this could be feeling like you’re at the end of your rope with your kids, snapping at them over small things when normally you wouldn’t, or feeling a constant sense of dread about going to work.
Mental Exhaustion
This affects your cognitive abilities. You might have trouble concentrating, be forgetful, or feel mentally foggy. Making decisions might feel incredibly difficult. This could manifest as staring at your to-do list for hours and not being able to start anything, or feeling like your brain is in a constant haze during meetings, unable to follow the conversation.
Reduced Performance
Burnout often leads to a decline in productivity and performance. You might feel like you’re working harder but achieving less. You might also become more negative or cynical about your work, and perhaps start making more mistakes or missing deadlines. This could show up as constantly feeling behind at work, even when putting in extra hours, or losing your usual passion and enthusiasm for projects you once loved.
Withdrawal and Isolation
As burnout deepens, you might find yourself withdrawing from social interactions. You might avoid friends, family, or colleagues and prefer to be alone. This could look like canceling plans repeatedly, ignoring texts or emails, or feeling like you have nothing left to give in your relationships.
Recognizing these signs in yourself is the first step to addressing burnout. It’s about acknowledging that something is not right, and that a bubble bath or a weekend getaway, while helpful, is not going to solve the underlying issues.
How to Heal From Burnout: Addressing the Root Causes
Think of it this way. If you have a minor cut, a bandaid is fine. If you’re bleeding heavily, you may eventually use a band-aid; but first you need to stop the bleeding. And there may be many steps after that necessary for you to properly heal as well as to keep the injury from coming back. Similarly, when you’re burnt out, you need to address the root causes, not just the symptoms.
How do you do that? How do you take steps to heal from burnout. First you need to identify what’s draining you and likely make some tough decisions. If we keep the medical emergency metaphor going, you need to triage your life. This means prioritizing what needs tending to, and then from there I highly recommend decluttering and simplifying.
Practical Steps to Overcome Burnout
Consider the following:
Boundaries
Are you saying yes to everything, leaving no time for yourself? Start setting clear boundaries. It might mean saying no to extra projects at work, or limiting your availability to others. This is hard, I know! But necessary.
Delegation
Is there anything you can delegate? Can you ask for help at home or at work? You don’t have to do it all alone.
Simplify
Can you simplify any part of your life? Maybe that means cutting back on social commitments, or simplifying your morning routine.
Rest
This is more than just sleep. I mean genuine rest. Time away from screens, time for stillness, time to just be. What fills your cup? Reading? Walking? Time in nature? Prioritize that.
Professional Help
Sometimes, burnout is too deep to address on your own. Don’t be afraid to seek professional help from a therapist or counselor. They can provide tools and strategies to help you heal.
Once you address the triage and make space for healing, you may also want to consider what nourishes and recharges you as well. Real self-care can be part of the healing journey when it’s done in conjunction with addressing and healing underlying issues.
When you are recovering from burnout, you want to refill your reserves while you’re plugging the leaks that are draining them in the first place.
Moving From Surviving to Thriving
Burnout is serious, and sadly, quite common in our hustle and grind world. But it’s also treatable. My goal as a holistic, compassionate productivity coach is to provide the resources you need to be aware of what causes burnout, to be productive in a way that bypasses it, and to understand what you need to recover from it.
With awareness, intentional action, and a lot of grace, you can shift from surviving to thriving. I promise you it’s possible and I’m here to help.
