Feel the Fear, Do It Anyway with Raven Waterman

Fear is a natural part of our lives. But when it gets in the way of living, of pursuing our dreams, that’s when we need to make a change. Fear is a powerful paralyzer that needn’t be. It’s time to change how we see it and learn to work with it, not against it. That’s why episode 30 of The Positively Living Podcast is about doing things despite feeling fear!

Feel the fear and do it anyway. Have you heard that phrase? Or seen it in a planner or on an inspirational poster or a workshop presentation? In the world of self-help, it comes up a lot, with good reason. Fear is a natural part of our lives. But when it gets in the way of living, of pursuing our dreams, that’s when we need to make a change. Fear is a powerful paralyzer that needn’t be. It’s time to change how we see it and learn to work with it, not against it. Today’s episode covers how to do that.

Fear seems like a pretty straightforward term, right? It’s defined as an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain or a threat. While that’s accurate, and natural–after all, we’re hardwired to find dangers so we can protect ourselves and stay safe — it’s when this emotion takes over and keeps you from living life that it becomes a problem.

Today I welcome Raven Waterman to the Positively Living Podcast to talk about how we can feel the fear, yet still take action.

Raven is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker/ Psychotherapist, Certified Life Coach, and Certified Executive Coach. For over 20 years, Raven has led teams and developed and implemented trainings designed to promote skill acquisition and enhance professional performance. As the owner and operator of Ravens Wings LLC she is committed to her mission of supporting professional women in taking the lead in their lives and shifting their mindset in order to achieve their goals

She and I connected over a similar mission to encourage women to take action and as we have both seen in our coaching, fear can be debilitating. Fear — which manifests itself in many ways — seems to come up most for professional women (and men) as self-doubt. And doubt causes indecision, inaction, and worry…all ingredients for what we perceive as failure.

It’s important to understand that Fear is not all bad. After all, it gives us a healthy respect for what we’re doing and is our brain’s way of protecting us. But when it blocks us from moving forward, making us play passive in our own lives, we are giving it unnecessary power. In our conversation today, Raven describes the internal dialogue to listen for when fear is paralyzing and suggests the kinds of support we need to get it under control.

While I am all for introspection and self-awareness, fear is an instance where searching for outward support may be necessary. Fear can often be contrary to reality, so it’s important to check it through a varied support network. Keep in mind friends, mentors, therapists, and coaches all work differently and support different aspects of your life — and understand and perceive your challenges differently too. But in combination, they can provide extremely effective support.

Be sure to listen for Raven’s descriptions of fear and the different responses as they relate to therapy versus coaching. It’s extremely helpful to assess where you are on your path and the type of help that will suit you best. You’ll see some overlap in the coach and counselor comparison in Episode #29 on Trauma with Mallory Jackson, which I highly recommend as a companion episode to this one.

Raven and I end our chat on a fun note in more ways than one. Not only does Raven offer a quintessential dance song (from one of the best dancers of all time, in my opinion) she also encourages us to focus on the excitement and joy of what we’re doing as an antidote to fear. Be sure to listen for that part of our conversation. It is filled with hope and is my favorite part.

As you listen to our conversation, remember this…Fear is normal. We all have it. We are not alone in this. The key is to manage it and feel it, not feed it.